Whether to have children

Is it wrong to decide not to?

For a married couple, it depends on why. Married love “is by its nature open to the acceptance of life”, CSDC 230 and a couple may still decide, “for serious reasons and in respect of the moral law, to avoid for a time or even indeterminately a new birth”. What they may not do is use the weight of that decision “as a justification for being selfishly closed”. CSDC 232

So the question is the motive. “For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children”, and “it is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishness but is in conformity with the generosity appropriate to responsible parenthood”. CCC 2368 Paul VI named the conditions that can count, “physical, economic, psychological and social”, and set no number: responsible parenthood is exercised “by those who prudently and generously decide to have more children, and by those who, for serious reasons and with due respect to moral precepts, decide not to have additional children for either a certain or an indefinite period of time”. It is not a private preference either: the couple “are not free to act as they choose in the service of transmitting life, as if it were wholly up to them to decide”. Humanae Vitae 10

How a birth is avoided matters as well. Periodic continence, relying on the infertile periods, “is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality”; contraception is not. CCC 2370

To the argument that the world has too many people, Francis answers, in the Compendium’s words, that “demographic growth is fully compatible with an integral and shared development”, and that “to blame population growth instead of extreme and selective consumerism on the part of some, is one way of refusing to face the issues”. Laudato si’ 50 And the Catechism asks that the choice not be weighed on this life alone: “human life and the duty of transmitting it are not limited by the horizons of this life only”. CCC 2371

Mother and child (the oval mirror), c. 1899

2368

A particular aspect of this responsibility concerns the regulation of procreation. For just reasons, spouses may wish to space the births of their children. It is their duty to make certain that their desire is not motivated by selfishness but is in conformity with the generosity appropriate to responsible parenthood. Moreover, they should conform their behavior to the objective criteria of morality:

When it is a question of harmonizing married love with the responsible transmission of life, the morality of the behavior does not depend on sincere intention and evaluation of motives alone; but it must be determined by objective criteria, criteria drawn from the nature of the person and his acts criteria that respect the total meaning of mutual self-giving and human procreation in the context of true love; this is possible only if the virtue of married chastity is practiced with sincerity of heart. GS 51 # 3.

2369

"By safeguarding both these essential aspects, the unitive and the procreative, the conjugal act preserves in its fullness the sense of true mutual love and its orientation toward man's exalted vocation to parenthood." Cf. HV 12.

2370

Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality. HV 16. These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, "every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible" is intrinsically evil: HV 14.

Thus the innate language that expresses the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive refusal to be open to life but also to a falsification of the inner truth of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality.... the difference, both anthropological and moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle . . . involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of the human person and of human sexuality. FC 32.

2371

"Let all be convinced that human life and the duty of transmitting it are not limited by the horizons of this life only: their true evaluation and full significance can be understood only in reference to man's eternal destiny." GS 51 # 4.

230

Conjugal love is by its nature open to the acceptance of life Cf. Catechism of the Catholic Church, 1652.. The dignity of the human being, called to proclaim the goodness and fruitfulness that come from God, is eminently revealed in the task of procreation: “Human fatherhood and motherhood, while remaining biologically similar to that of other living beings in nature, contain in an essential and unique way a ‘likeness' to God which is the basis of the family as a community of human life, as a community of persons united in love (communio personarum)” John Paul II, Letter to Families Gratissimam Sane, 6: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 86 (1994) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1994), 874; cf. Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2366.. Procreation expresses the social subjectivity of the family and sets in motion a dynamism of love and solidarity between the generations upon which society is founded. It is necessary to rediscover the social value of that portion of the common good inherent in each new human being. Every child “becomes a gift to its brothers, sisters, parents and entire family. Its life becomes a gift for the very people who were givers of life and who cannot help but feel its presence, its sharing in their life and its contribution to their common good and to that of the community of the family” John Paul II, Letter to Families Gratissimam Sane, 11: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 86 (1994) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1994), 884..

231

The family founded on marriage is truly the sanctuary of life, “the place in which life — the gift of God — can be properly welcomed and protected against the many attacks to which it is exposed, and can develop in accordance with what constitutes authentic human growth” John Paul II, Encyclical Letter Centesimus Annus, 39: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 83 (1991) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1991), 842.. Its role in promoting and building the culture of life Cf. John Paul II, Encyclical Letter Evangelium Vitae, 92: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 87 (1995) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1995), 505-507. against “the possibility of a destructive ‘anti-civilization', as so many present trends and situations confirm” John Paul II, Letter to Families Gratissimam Sane, 13: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 86 (1994) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1994), 891., is decisive and irreplaceable. Christian families have then, in virtue of the sacrament received, a particular mission that makes them witnesses and proclaimers of the Gospel of life. This is a commitment which in society takes on the value of true and courageous prophecy. It is for this reason that “serving the Gospel of life ... means that the family, particularly through its membership in family associations, works to ensure that the laws and institutions of the State in no way violate the right to life, from conception to natural death, but rather protect and promote it” John Paul II, Encyclical Letter Evangelium Vitae, 93: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 87 (1995) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1995), 507-508..

232

The family contributes to the social good in an eminent fashion through responsible motherhood and fatherhood, the spouses' special participation in God's work of creation Cf. Second Vatican Ecumenical Council, Pastoral Constitution Gaudium et Spes, 50: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 58 (1966) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1966), 1070-1072; Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2367.. The weight of this responsibility must not be used as a justification for being selfishly closed but must guide the decisions of the spouses in a generous acceptance of life. “In relation to physical, economic, psychological and social conditions, responsible parenthood is exercised both in the duly pondered and generous decision to have a large family, and in the decision, made for serious reasons and in respect of the moral law, to avoid for a time or even indeterminately a new birth” Paul VI, Encyclical Letter Humanae Vitae, 10: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 60 (1968) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1968), 487; cf. Second Vatican Ecumenical Council, Pastoral Constitution Gaudium et Spes, 50: AAS — Acta Apostolicae Sedis (official gazette of the Holy See)Volume 58 (1966) at vatican.va — scanned PDF (1966), 1070-1072.. The motivations that should guide the couple in exercising responsible motherhood and fatherhood originate in the full recognition of their duties towards God, towards themselves, towards the family and towards society in a proper hierarchy of values.

Laudato si’ May 24, 2015
Humanae Vitae Jul 25, 1968

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